I'm so glad you're here

I’m so glad you’re here. You don’t have to be. But you are.

It’s ok if you’re not. There isn’t nobility in the fight for its own sake. But there’s something so special in you just being around.

I’m thankful for you. Thankful that you breathe, that you exist, that you are someone who brings joy into my world.

You’d be missed if you were gone. You’d leave a hole in my heart that could never be filled. But there’s no guilt in that statement. I don’t mind a few gaps, because they mean that we mattered to each other.

Some of you have already left. And I miss you. I think about you often. Sometimes not as much as I’d want, but I think you’d be ok with that too, because I’m continuing to love and be loved. I think about what could have been. And I wish I could just talk to you about the insignificant but exciting thing I did yesterday. But it’s ok that you’re gone. The joy I had for the time we were together helped make this world a little more beautiful. I learned from you, I cling to those three memories that still remain. Because I lost you, I cling just a little tighter to the ones that are still here. Some days I just appreciate the fact that I have them, that they’re just around.

I appreciate your conversation. Some days I get to just sit and talk to you for hours, and that makes life sweeter. Some days you send me a quick message to remind me that you care. Thank you for that.

Some days, because you’re gone of course, I just get a tiny reminder of you. Maybe it’s a quirk of a family member who is still around. They remind me of you.

I appreciate you, the one who stuck around the whole time, has always been there, always watched out for me, helped me make sense of the world when no-one else could.

You are special to me, even though I don’t understand some of the things you’re trying to do. You spent so much time helping me, explaining the world, just being there. I so appreciate you.

You are so amazing. We haven’t known each other for long, but I can already see a lifetime of journeys behind you that connects us. We don’t need to have decades of personal experience to know that we matter to each other.

Some of you frustrate me to no end. I don’t understand you, I don’t get why you do certain things. But that’s ok. I still appreciate you, still see how much you’re trying, how challenging the world may seem, and how much you’re trying to find your place in it. It’s ok if you don’t know. And actually you might be a little happier if you could put down the cardboard. But if you don’t, it’s ok. You’re just trying, and I appreciate you.

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This is a love letter to so many people in my life.

Each one of you have mattered in tiny, special ways. From the ones I’ve known since day one, to the ones I just had a nice chat with yesterday for the first time. Each person lends a little bit to making this life beautiful. I’ve even begun to appreciate the ones who challenge and disagree with me. Not because I always come around to their way of thinking, but because the honesty shows me that I’m not only around people that say what I’d want to hear.

If you’re wondering if you impact someone, the answer is yes.